it's quiet now

and then it stops. and it's quiet now. somehow fellings of calm and unease both exist inside of you, but dont mix together. like oil in water.
you made it, you're here.
But what now? this endlessly long journey, what was it for? you came all this way for what, a light? some artificial hope in the emptiness of it all, grafted into this bleak reality like a plastic toothpick in a nonexistant haystack.
the light is cold, and you shiver under it's sickly green rays. but everything else around you is colder, swallowed by black, so you settle in. slowly sliding down the pole of the streetlight, you sit down, staring ahead. the void. the nothingness that has held you in it's arms, nurtured you, and taught you it's values. you grew up on it, it has watched over you since you were nothing.
and you miss it. in a twisted, nostalgic sort of way. you miss it's crushing critisisms, and forced compassion, manipulating you into doing things you dont want to do. but you're on your own now. independant.

and you think back, to the other lights you have encountered, after all the other endlessly long journeys. what were they all for? all lights dissapear down here. nothing lasts. soon this light too, will loose it's strength, dim slowly untill the whole contraption fades into obscuity once again.
you look down, and you see your sneakers. grimy and worn from years of use, but a single red stripe has survived on the outside of each shoe. despite all their wear and tear, they're comfortable, and even if you had the oppourtunity, you wouldn't trade them for the world. you feel better when you look at them. it's been so long since they were last seen.
digging through your pockets, you fish out a small yellow Ipod with earbuds hastily wound around it. you unwind them slowly, carefully put one in each ear, and turn the delicate contraption on. an equally cold blue light is cast upon your face, but it's infinetly more soothing. scrolling through your list og 14 songs, you find what you're looking