Dear Friend

Part I - Forget about me

Dear friend,

We haven’t talked in a while. Can’t say that I miss you.
Although, we’ve been friends for such a long time that it’s difficult remembering life without you, I wouldn’t be saddened if you stopped being my friend. In fact, I wish we’d never met.

But...when did we actually meet, though? Was it on that damned afternoon when it rained as much as I cried, and I kept crying until I fell asleep? Did our paths cross then? No. I think it was long before that.

Maybe, it was that spring morning when I truly felt the cold for the first time. When the outside became, both, smothering and unbearably endless; and I, so small and vulnerable. I found you on my way to school. Or was it you that found me? Doesn’t really matter.

You know, most of my childhood memories are like faded photographs. I can barely guess the images behind the fade. But that day, when you walked by my side until I reached the school gate, is deeply etched into my memory. You made it so.

I held back my tears, because, young as I was, I didn’t want others to see my sadness. Your presence comforted me. Even though my steps felt heavy, there was a lightness in my mind that kept me from crumbling. That lightness came from you. I know now that it shouldn’t have. That it’s not how things should be. Little did I know that the lightness you gifted me, would become my addiction. My curse. And ironically, even my strength.

Perhaps, that’s the reason we can’t let go of each other. I find comfort in your twisted self, and you have someone that fuels your existence.

I wish...I want to let you go. Can you stop knocking at my door? Please! Can you stop calling my name? Can you just...stop!

Please, dear friend, forget about me!